I’m no arsenal fan, and neither am I so much into soccer as a fan, but I have followed the events in football and can draw quite reliable conclusions.
Arsenal as a team has spoken to my life through the experience they have had over the last decade or so.
A life filled with a ring of expectations, resolutions, and failures forged by fate as the blacksmith running round to contain both I and arsenal as a team in the latter years, so that we do not escape for a better status.
Where are the results for all my mental efforts, all the plans, and hopes? What do I have to show for it, bar frustration?
I was like any other foreseeing kid, or a bit sharper. I dreamt big and laid plans that stayed on paper. I have made resolution after resolution over the years, all documented articulately and seemingly timely.
At the end of a season, however, I only show participation in life as an achievement, and perhaps breathe as proof I’m permitted to try again and achieve my goals the next year, only to achieve the same “nothing” again.
After several years of such circular movement, I evaluated my life and got hit hard, I’m only running in circles with no achievement nor progress of any tangible sort.
Each new year I rise enthusiastically and plan, set goals, and start working as early towards executing my plans, just like arsenal resets and recruits new members before a new season. Unfortunately, at the end of each year, I only have to adjust my resolutions and goals due to change in times, but never because I have any success to show or build on. Such has been on and on, so much the same story that, it’s more like the ideal for me, like not achieving success is success in a way that I live to plan success in the future.
All this happens while others progress, friends that were behind me in all life’s aspects have moved ahead. Again, sounds like an arsenal story. The top four became almost a trophy for the team, while other teams like Chelsea and Manchester City moved ahead and won the league.
It’s written on every wall that I’m only good at setting resolutions, and completely clueless past that. This is not in any way true, for I do move and try everything in my reach to execute plans made, however, perhaps luck chose me for loathing.
I have been held in such a cycle for almost a decade, I have now walked the earth for slightly over two decades, but all I can show are my two offsprings from a failed relationship, whom I can barely take care of.
I’m with no doubt frustrated, angry, and tired. What more have I to do? How better shall I move? From which point did I have to start?
I have planned, strategized, and acted for years, but yielded nothing always.
I do not know anymore what wrong or right decision I have made, neither can I tell which step I always miss. It all looks like I’m all made for wrong decisions that never work.
Sincerely, latter arsenal in a human form.
